Outlander Season 5 Episode 12 Recap: Never My Love

Posted by Ashley Crawley

Want to relive the Outlander Season 5 Episode 12? We do a minute-by-minute reaction to “Never My Love.”

Happy Mother’s Day, and welcome to the mother of all episodes! You know, the final one where we exhaust everything we have to track down the ultimate mother hen and go medieval on any motherbrowner who laid so much as a pinky on her. Moral of the story: DON’T MESS WITH MAMA ON MOTHER’S DAY (or ever). Now let’s go get her, lads!

[9:00 p.m.] Why can’t this show enable a “choose your own adventure” function? Given this episode’s content warning, I’d prefer return to simpler penultimate times, pull a Wilson Pickett and dance my way through the land of 1000 goodbyes and PB&J sandwiches. Given the number of them I’ve consumed in the past week, I’m pretty sure we’re handfasted now.

[9:01 p.m.] Such a sharp move by the writers and editors to pivot away from the “previously on Outlander” recapping formula in favor of this wordless style. While silent movies might have helped Roger’s brain recount his horrific ordeal, this boom-flash drumbeat of haunting images matches ours and the way we’ve emotionally squirmed through the sequence of events that led us here.

[9:02 p.m.] Holy wall of windows, Claire, so much natural light! Yes girl. I’m all for mid-century modern architecture and decor, but I’m not sure coveting future you’s design taste is what I should OH MY GOD YOU FINALLY FOUND A HOME FOR THE VASE AND FUTURE JAMIE IN A LEATHER COAT MIGHT HAVE BEEN THE HOT EMBER THAT IGNITED THE BIG HOUSE IN THAT PAINTING AND AND AND
*takes huge breath*

You guys, if early warning signs are any indication, I’m not sure I’m who you need to help weather the category 5 nature of this episode.

[9:03 p.m.] Someone please let Lionel know that he’s no blue-ribbon prize. His wife avoids his bed for a plethora of reasons; Dr. Rawlings’ sage birth control advice is just one.

[9:04 p.m.] What a Hodgepile of shite. She’s no witch, but of all the future events Claire’s ever predicted, warning him of their collective deaths by dawn is the strongest one yet.

[9:05 p.m.] A breast gouge, cryptic man on the moon reference and drunken rapey banter all in the same minute. I surmise the only way to stomach this episode is to cling to the wistful bits Claire’s offering us to cope. So that’s how I’ll choose to remember this minute — by the comforting throwback to the first-ever episode where Jamie wrapped Claire in his tartan for warmth some 25-plus years ago.

[9:06 p.m.] Key takeaway: Be good to Tebbe. Also, just my two cents — let’s not feel the need to share with Tebbe about how the bread makes you think of that time you baked dozens of loaves to watch them mold so you could formulate life-saving medicine from the year nineteen hundred and sixty-eight.

[9:07 p.m.] Still over here on a singular mission to cope with hope. This minute brought to you by a delicious alternate universe in which Fergus starts his own French Beatles-esque boy band, sexy and happily married Uncle Murtagh has taken over for Don Draper in running Sterling Cooper and Claire’s greatest lesson to Marsali focuses on how to properly layer and slice a PB&J for her tiny humans.

[9:08 p.m.] “On your feet, bitch.” Okay now that’s just not cool. The same Outlander gods who gifted us a blue vase and chattering teeth made warmer by a hulking Scot also just bastardized the sacred term of endearment Claire always offers Jamie in some form or another. But then, they’ve also just tossed us back onto the battlefields of Culloden with this symbolic bunny, and we know how that ended for Jamie (alive — not well, but alive).

[9:09 p.m.] How ironic that of all the references this time-traveling goober could have leveraged to suss out Claire’s story while she’s tied to a tree in utter despair, he used Ringo Starr, the man whose voice continues to remind us how we get by with a little help from our friends.

[9:10 p.m.] Otter Tooth’s name was Bob, not unlike the overseas call-center rep who Americanizes his name before offering you tech support in increasing your data storage size.

[9:11 p.m.] Telling a woman whose life hinges on the mercy of 12 angry men intent on harmonizing their own 18th century version of “Yo Ho Yo Ho, A Pirate’s Life for Me” about how she “ought to act more afraid” is the most asshat statement ever muttered.

[9:12 p.m.] And we’ve gone down the rapey rabbit hole, so I’m taking my cue from Claire in diverting my brain with something — anything — while it tries to process this brutality. Join me in memorizing the lyrics to “Never My Love” if you haven’t by now. Or take a walk down memory lane and relive the simple joy of childhood pillow fights.

[9:13 p.m.] Echoing Jamie’s toast to Claire, our stunning lady in red, and adding to it the ‘80s lyrics rolling through my head for comfort:

I’ve never seen you looking so gorgeous as you did tonight
I’ve never seen you shine so bright, you were amazing
I’ve never seen so many people want to be there by your side
And when you turned to me and smiled, it took my breath away
And I have never had such a feeling
Such a feeling of complete and utter love, as I do tonight

[9:14 p.m.] We exist in a world full of distraction and demand where the pursuit of mindfulness — “be present, live in the moment” — often feels like its own billion-dollar industry. But the reality of Claire’s present is more horrendous than any of us, her included, can comprehend. So escape away, Sassenach. Check the turkey. Gaze longingly at the curly-haired Scot across the table. Host the most Hallmark-worthy holiday dinner there ever was. Do your ever-loving best to live anywhere but in this moment.

[9:15 p.m.] Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ, this poor woman can’t even daydream in peace without tragedy. This beautiful picture is missing the only individuals who actually could be part of this futuristic look at Fraser Mac family life. Why must our brains kill the fun and cross enemy lines?

[9:16 p.m.] Well sing me a song of a lass that is not really gone, that was the most anti-climatic road trip ever! Who misbehaved in the backseat? And also, Ian.

[9:17 p.m.] Home. Oh I see what you did there… neat. But for the record, please don’t look to me for more than a few vanilla tears the next time you two get another itch to time travel and stage an hour-long parade of goodbyes. I’m fresh out.

[9:18 p.m.] Hell hath no fury like a kilted James Fraser with a satchel full of jerky. IT’S ON.

Also, Jamie just shot Bree an “I’ll deal with this later” parenting face in reply to her “yeahhhhh, about that whole time traveling thing…” My mom has perfected the art of arching a single eyebrow to achieve a similar look — and yes, it still works.

[9:19 p.m.] We all attended the gathering and promised to stand by your side, as kin of your house. It’s for Mistress Claire, so we’re all coming.

[9:20 p.m.] “Never [F*CK with] My Love”: The alternate title Jamie just submitted for this episode. You’ve got my vote.

However, for those with small children in need of a more G rating, he’s got you covered too: “Going on a Claire Hunt.”

[9:21 p.m.] We’ve persevered through numerous battlefields in our five seasons of this show, none more important or impactful than the one we’re undertaking here. And given what Claire’s endured, the real battle hasn’t actually begun.

[9:22 p.m.] “Dinna be afraid, just the two of us now.” And I’m gone. Only Jamie could break her escapist trance. And when at a loss for words, only Jamie would know to borrow from reassuring sentiment used the last time he freed a loved one from the throes of death.

[9:23 p.m.] If there’s any silver-lining gift to this episode airing on Mother’s Day, it’s in seeing how the young boys mama bear Claire helped raise into men of worth are here in force for her, in her darkest hour.

[9:24 p.m.] “It is done.” Anyone else flashing back to Wentworth Prison? All that’s missing are a herd of Highland coos and a fired-up Murtagh. Sigh. Murtagh.

[9:25 p.m.] We’re all collectively wrapped up in the protection of that plaid, staring down the aftermath of Claire’s Culloden.

[9:26 p.m.] Even the exterminator always misses at least one bug when he sprays the house for pests. And naturally, here that bug is bad, bad Lionel Brown, baddest man in the whole damned town.

[9:27 p.m.] Ever the mother, her first collected thought is of Marsali’s welfare. Affix your own air mask before helping others — one of my standing life mottos. And one I, along with many other moms, toss aside in favor of that maternal instinct that immutably drives us toward a child’s needs over our own.

[9:28 p.m.] Frigging Donner or Blitzen or whatever that non-contributing zero called himself. He’s got another thing coming if and when we meet him later, and I suspect we will.

[9:29 p.m.] Dearest Emmy and Golden Globe voters, behold: the incomparable Caitriona Balfe. Please and thank you.

[9:30 p.m.] The men did their blood, sweat and tears thing. And now it’s the women’s turn. Just a reminder that no matter how deep or unstable the walls, we women will always jump in the hole to comfort each other and work together to claw a way out.

[9:31 p.m.] When compared to watching a bloodied Claire contemplate scrubbing her skin raw, I much preferred the last time we saw her soaking in a tub over this one. Also, 9:29… again.

[9:32 p.m.] The sight of her tears our hearts too, Jamie… but hold up, we kept that bastard alive?!

[9:33 p.m.] “I’ll be alright; I’m just a little shaken…” Don’t you love how we often downplay the severity of our struggles or emotions? Time for another quiz! Is that because:

A) we fear looking weak
B) we don’t want to burden others with our pain
C) it’s easier to convince ourselves it’s not that bad than to admit and start to unpack how truly awful it really is
D) anything else a therapist has ever told me
E) any combo of the above

[9:34 p.m.] Insert laundry list of atrocities, nevertheless she persisted. It’s a war cry for Claire, and for Outlander fans as well. That list was a nasty reminder of the excessive volume of violence we’ve endured in five seasons. But life doesn’t spare victims the abuse, so why would you invest in a show that glosses over that reality? It’s not always sunshine and giggles and bubbles.

[9:35 p.m.] “What a horrific combination of words for anyone to have to find within themselves… and utter to another being.” Well said, Roger Mac. These two know as well as anyone that when you’re the victim of a brutal assault, you find your voice and “your person” in your own timing, and only your timing.

[9:36 p.m.] I understand this pillow confession is necessary for evolving Roger’s character. But does he think Bree assumed he rode off with this version of her father then just stayed on his horse snacking on jerky and reciting poetry, keeping his hands clean while the others did all the dirty killing? Hmm.

[9:37 p.m.] Well well… not so high and mighty now, are we, Lionel? MERCY SHALL NOT FOLLOW THEE.

[9:38 p.m.] Do it now, and don’t be gentle. And what’s with the vitamin C metaphor? Did she finetune her surgical skills by practicing on an orange? Someone please explain to this Florida native the significance of citrus I’m missing here.

[9:39 p.m.] Doctors often take to hallways and stairwells alone to unleash a flood of tears they’ve stored up about the fragility of life or grief of losing a patient. But this is a spin on it I don’t care to see for Dr. Claire.

Also, at the risk of sounding like a broken “Never My Love” record: 9:29… on repeat.

[9:40 p.m.] Did Rapey McPherson just sling more disparaging remarks about women and thinly veiled threats at Marsali while restrained on his deathbed? Well that’s a choice.

…annnd Season 5 rounds to a close with reason #1922 why Marsali is a badass. That water hemlock finally found its rightful owner.

[9:41 p.m.] I guess Roger’s not the only one logging (and second-guessing) his first kill this episode.

[9:42 p.m.] And only the King of Men would still march this dead arsehole home for a proper burial by his family. Thump.

[9:43 p.m.] Richard Brown’s face was all “well that’s no whisky.” If Claire’s Hippocratic oath guides her to first do no harm, then this gesture suggests Jamie’s leadership oath implores him to do what he must to prevent more harm.

[9:44 p.m.] Donner, Blitzen and Brown: your Colonial accounting firm and also the growing list of a-holes we’ll apparently still have to deal with later.

[9:45 p.m.] “There was a time not so long ago that I wasn’t sure we’d ever be walking up to this house again.” Um, that’s because it was last week, Roger. Also, he just made those home-seeking stones sound like Dorothy’s slippers.

[9:46 p.m.] Who but Claire can turn the world on with her honey-do lists and smile? Who can take a nothing day, and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile? Well it’s you girl, and you should know it. You’re going to make it after all.

[9:47 p.m.] Jamie’s wisely dipping back into that “if ain’t broke, don’t fix it” bag of word tricks to meet Claire where she is, soothing her after this storm and before the next.

Side note: Did Lord John Grey predict more than one storm? I don’t recall that, which means I retract what I said previously about the reliability of his meteorology forecasts over most.

[9:48 p.m.] In the wake of his Wentworth Prison hell, Jamie felt as if he was naked and scrambling for cover under a blade of grass until Claire finally built him a metaphorical lean-to for shelter. And now a naked Jamie is all the lean-to and more Claire could ever need for security and comfort after her own trauma.

[9:49 p.m.] Wait, it’s over?! SCOOCH OVER, CLAIRE. MAKE ROOM FOR ME.

[9:50 p.m.] In an episode full of music (and my own rambling connections to more), what an emotionally appropriate way to close this episode by offering Raya Yarbrough’s voice and nothing more. Sometimes we have to quiet the noise in our head to hear only the clarity of our own voice, and that’s a steep uphill challenge Claire will continue to have ahead of her.

Closing thoughts:

Give me just a moment with the calming rainfall of the Outlander sound machine I assume they’ve placed here thinking it will help ease us to sleep tonight after this episode. Not likely, but thanks for the gesture.

Breathe. Reminder to myself, and all of us. Season 5 has not been short on difficult moments to swallow, but they unequivocally saved the toughest for last. This show has never shied away from wrenching material, and the current count of “crimes of an especially heinous nature” would overwhelm even the most hardened investigative team. Jamie, Claire, Roger, Ian, Fergus, Bree — at this point, they could just wordlessly look at each offering an empathetic “yeah, I know” at shared membership in a club no one willingly joins. And while I could donkey-kick Outlander in the teeth for the nature of this episode, if we stop exploring the ugly underbelly of assault (of any kind) and its long-term effects because it’s not “fun to watch,” then we become assailants of another sort.

The silver lining? In an episode full of emotional right hooks, I found plenty of gifts worth passing around in my continued attempt to cope with hope. Because I like meaningful numbers, here are 5 to close out Season 5:

Today’s forecast calls for powerful performances all around. I’m looking squarely at you, Caitriona Balfe (though, honorable mentions to Sam Heughan and Lauren Lyle). Simply incredible and worthy of any industry trophy, though you’ve already got a mantle of them if it were up to us. For any naysayer who has ever suggested this “historical romance” show is “soapy,” dare them to watch this episode and see hard evidence of how Outlander tackles the raw and often gritty realities of human life and emotion.

The kids are all right. The Outlander youth has encountered more turbulence and hardship in their short lives than anyone should have to bear over a lifetime. And yet, it hasn’t stymied their ability to become all-around kickass humans. The next generation is intently listening — both in word and through action — on every purposeful and inadvertent lesson tossed their way by life circumstances or Jamie and Claire. And they showed up en masse here to remind us of that when it counted the most, not unlike how today’s youth is teaching us about how to stand tall during this particularly trying time in the world. Don’t doubt their resiliency, or that they’re listening. Happy Mother’s Day indeed.

Grab those Easter baskets, friends. For a Mother’s Day-timed episode, we sure enjoyed one hell of an Easter egg hunt! Skip the chocolate bunnies — what a decadent treat for diehard fans to feast on all the nods to past seasons. I’ll spare you an “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours” look at the eggs I gathered. Instead, look for a forthcoming Outlander Cast blog post from fellow writer Karen K. Rutledge later this week detailing them all.

That ‘70s Show. While the show pulled this gruesome event straight from the book, only the medium of TV could offer a stylized look into how Claire’s brain might choose to pass the painstaking minutes of her ordeal. Ever pondered a hypothetical world where everyone jumps through the stones to a safer, shinier life in a different ‘70s era? Boom, you got it. From the fashion and hairstyles to million-watt smiles and renewed relationships, this was the unexpected Outlander gift you didn’t ask for, and never knew you desperately needed.

Put your finger here. The final present was in how Outlander chose to tie it up with a bow as best as they could given what transpired in the 40-plus minutes before. Was it all rainbows? Of course not. It shouldn’t be. They did what they could to offer a responsible look into the Frasers’ long recovery road ahead while also serving us a hug and a cup of hot tea before sending us off into the great Droughtlander unknown.

And that’s a wrap, folks! Thanks for joining me in the weekly wild ride that was Season 5 and the minute-by-minute recaps. It’s been an absolute pleasure and I appreciate your patronage here more than words can express. I’m no Claire, boasting no clear vision for when we’ll meet again in this setting. However, please know you can always find me in this humble little corner of the Outlander world. It’s my tightly wrapped tartan plaid or warm Jamie spoon of sorts. Until then, friends…

If you’ve missed any of our Season 5 episode recaps, you can catch up with them here:

Episode 5.01: “The Fiery Cross”

Episode 5.02: “Between Two Fires”

Episode 5.03: “Free Will”

Episode 5.04: “The Company We Keep”

Episode 5.05: “Perpetual Adoration”

Episode 5.06: “Better to Marry than Burn”

Episode 5.07: “The Ballad of Roger Mac”

Episode 5.08: “Famous Last Words”

Episode 5.09: “Monsters and Heroes ”

Episode 5.10: “Mercy Shall Follow Me”

Episode 5.11: “Journeycake”

A complete library of recaps from Seasons 2-4 is also available here.

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36 Comments

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Lauren
· Reply

May 11, 2020 at 2:51 PM

Ashley, thanks so much for your recap. It was great to read.
The Orange calls back to the Orange in King Louis’ chamber. It’s there for Claire as a symbol of her indestructible nature, and near the end when she remembers it before she contemplates killing Lionel, she picks up the orange and walks away, just like she did in King Louis’ chamber, thereby saying in effect, I will always remain who I am, no circumstance or person can take that way.

I’m with you on the first glimpse of Jamie in the 1960s house. I loved the imagery and symbolism in all those scenes. It was as if Jamie and Claire lived for each other in whatever century or dreamscape they find themselves in. These scenes displayed how their love is eternal in ways that no words possibly could. It takes a lot for me to cry, and I did here, when Claire turns around and Jamie comes into the room.

I loved what Jamie says to Claire at the Thanksgiving dinner, so beautiful. And that he wraps her in the plaid and holds her as the rain comes down and the roof leaks (symbols of the rain/hurt pouring in her present). Lionel comes up to the glass in the window but he can’t touch her because Jamie holds her while her eyes are closed, rocking.

I wasn’t sure what Claire was referring to when she said she had listed “betrayed” as one of he sorrows. I couldn’t think of who she was betrayed by.

It looks like Eppie (the Caribbean man) didn’t survive. He was among the men that survived the battle and was killed.

I agree that this episode didn’t look away from Claire’s brutalization, and yet it didn’t linger in it either. The rape scenes weren’t explicit, and they were brief. I felt overall it was about Claire and Jamie’s undying love through time and space.
- Lauren
  · Reply
  
  May 11, 2020 at 4:17 PM
  
  PS: I just noticed that the Big House in the painting is on fire. There’s smoke pouring out the window in front and in back. Claire is looking at something that has happened or will happen, it’s ambiguous. She doesn’t fear it, she looks matter-of-factly at it, smiling. There’s wallpaper from Lallybroch’s master bedroom on one wall. When they slow dance, a light dims in the background. I noticed the vase too and the whiskey.
  
  It just occurred to me that when Claire sees the orange in the surgery and she’s in the house in the 60s, why would Claire see that place when she’s no longer in danger? It made me think that her 1960s house wasn’t a fantasy but that she actually went there. As if she had a vision and traveled.
  - Ashley Crawley
    · Reply
    
    Author
    
    May 12, 2020 at 12:22 PM
    
    Yes! It WAS on fire! I pondered in the post whether the hotness of Jamie in that leather coat had set the painting on fire. 🙂 My interpretation, and just mine, is that you’re meant to believe that in her safe space alternate world, they left the Ridge for safety when they knew that dying in a fire was a possibility. They brought everyone with them to carry out their family bliss in a safer time and space and the painting reminds them of previous life. My two cents. But I did love that in her fantasy, the ONLY people missing from it were the ones who could actually time travel and be part of a future life.
    - Lauren
      · Reply
      
      May 14, 2020 at 6:37 PM
      
      I love your thought Ashley, that they had left for a safe place.
- Lynn Horner
  · Reply
  
  May 11, 2020 at 5:29 PM
  
  Laoghaire betrayed Claire. Big time!
  - Lauren
    · Reply
    
    May 11, 2020 at 9:43 PM
    
    Lynn, Claire didn’t put her trust in Laoghaire though. So I don’t think she would consider what Laoghaire did as a betrayal. It must be Geillis, now that I think about it. Geillis did betray Claire in the end.
    - Ashley Crawley
      · Reply
      
      Author
      
      May 12, 2020 at 12:36 PM
      
      Lots of comments about the betrayals! Here’s the running tally in my head – none maybe big enough to be THE thing she’d used to mention it, but rather the collective sum of them all makes “betrayal” worth adding to her list of things she’s had to overcome.
      – The trials in S1 and how she got there
      – Jamie promising not to duel with BJR but then going back on that and everything that happened after
      – Frank’s affair (specifically, the one shown) in Boston
      – Whatever combo of emotions she’d assign to labeling Jamie marrying Laoghaire
      – Maybe more I’m forgetting?
  - Ashley Crawley
    · Reply
    
    Author
    
    May 12, 2020 at 12:31 PM
    
    That damn doll under the bed. We should’ve known.
- Ashley Crawley
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  Author
  
  May 12, 2020 at 12:18 PM
  
  Lauren, I’ve had plenty of people fill me in on the significance of the orange but please know… yours was the first explanation I read and I loved that it was from you, specifically. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed reading your comments on the episodes this season so thank you for taking the time to leave them. I know there’s plenty of conversation on the betrayal, so I’ll weigh in there. But really am just here to say THANK YOU.
  - Lauren
    · Reply
    
    May 23, 2020 at 4:08 PM
    
    Thank you for your kind words Ashley. I’ve loved reading all of your posts this season and to talk with you here. I reread your recap of Episode 12 and I loved the hearing/seeing the complete “Never My Love” song. I also loved what you said about Roger and telling Bree he killed someone. So funny, and so true. Was that video you posted along with that from Django Unchained? Whatever it was from, perfect. Jamie: fury for his love unleashed. No picnic for Roger, that’s for sure. 🙂
Moe C
· Reply

May 11, 2020 at 3:13 PM

Ashley – I can not imagine…for a second!…how you managed to write this NEXT DAY recap – in your infamous style that we have come to know and love from you – and pull it off IN SPADES after watching what we collectively “endured” with this episode. KUDOS to you in all imaginable ways!! This one was no cake walk – to watch or to write about!

I am a book reader. I knew, to some degree, what was coming and was dreading it. However, one never knows how the show writers will adapt it. Given it all, I decided to wait and watch it for the first time last evening with the Outlander Cast family. So glad I did! Also, so glad no one could hear me screaming at the TV ( except my husband, who saw all of the warnings at the beginning of the episode and ran for cover!). This episode created such a VISCERAL reaction in me…it took me ‘til today to recover. Seeing an event of that magnitude transpire vs reading of it in a book…very different.

I will need to watch it again when my constitution recovers, but it was remarkable on so many levels. I knew Lionel bore watching from the first second I saw him early in the season, but I would have never predicted that the show writers would make him the rapist! But he was well suited for the role, all right!! And death by syringe…YES! Go Marsali – A+ for being able to inject the jugular!! You pass with flying colors!

The orange…I was on the You Tube feed during the show last night and there was discussion about the orange harkening back to the King of France…

So much symbolism!

Moe C.
- Ashley Crawley
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  Author
  
  May 12, 2020 at 12:20 PM
  
  Oh Moe! I adore you. I do have to say — I lingered in the glow of Mother’s Day as long as I could before watching this episode. Waiting until late Sunday night delayed the recap, but also gave me time to revisit it the next morning to make sure I used the words that delicately balanced the importance of the storytelling here with some light-hearted humor thrown in for sanity. I hope it found that balance, but even still, that it found its way to you is happiness for me. Thank you for reading and commenting on the posts this season!
  - Moe C.
    · Reply
    
    May 12, 2020 at 9:50 PM
    
    Ashley -your recaps are well worth the wait, no matter when they appear! I am so glad you got to enjoy Mother’s Day! Moe
Elizabeth A Taylor
· Reply

May 11, 2020 at 4:37 PM

Once again you bring me back to balance between rage at the nuances that the show considers expendable (how dare they?) and despair as we start the longest Droughtlander ever. I object to the artsy “extras” they inject , not so much because they don’t work (they do!) but because they take up precious time in a too short 12 episode season that could be used for scenes from the books that seem mandatory for character development. And your humor always helps to mend my wounded heart. Please don’t ever stop!!
- Ashley Crawley
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  Author
  
  May 12, 2020 at 12:31 PM
  
  Elizabeth — I’m so glad to hear that! The humor, as long as it’s not insensitive to the subject matter, helping sooth a wounded heart is my intent. Thank you so much for reading and commenting.
Sandi
· Reply

May 11, 2020 at 5:42 PM

Thank you for a wonderful recap. What an amazing finale. So much symbolism in the dream/coping sequences it will take several watches to catch them all. I love the care and respect that was used in portraying sexual assault. The true focus, however was what sustains us during trauma and what brings us back from that horrible abyss. We only caught glimpses of the true horror, thank goodness, but instead spent much more time learning what was bolstering Claire. She was firm with Brown from the beginning he would be dead by morning. She had no doubt Jaime would come for her. Caitrona Balfe certainly deserves awards at the Emmys and Golden Globes.

I too thought about the betrayal as well. Perhaps Frank and his affairs or even Jaime and his broken promise in Paris not to fight BJR?

I was actually relieved to see Claire lose it after she chose not to hurt Brown. Every person, regardless of how strong has a breaking point, including Claire. It would not have been honest to have her simply walk away from the surgery. There is a reason doctors have boundaries on who they treat and after trauma when they go back to work.

I love who Marsali is becoming. More, please. She is an incredible daughter, wife, mother and sister. Her character needs to continue to grow and be seen. Because of Marsali we can once again have nice things.

This has been a great season. I have thoroughly enjoyed the trials and joys of the Ridge. Let’s hope we can all move on safely so we can get back to some sort of new normal and look forward to Season 6. We need to know more about Ian and why he is back. A loose end that was not neatly tied up a bow.

Be well. Stay safe.
- Lauren
  · Reply
  
  May 11, 2020 at 9:50 PM
  
  Sandy, I thought too about Jamie and Paris and the betrayal that she felt initially. But since Claire realized how unfair she was to Jamie and that she felt she was to blame, I didn’t think she would still hold that against him. I thought of Geillis because Claire was surprised by her betrayal. Frank had affairs during the war, no? I like that thought too.
  - Lauren
    · Reply
    
    May 11, 2020 at 9:51 PM
    
    “Sandi” Sorry.
    - Sandi
      · Reply
      
      May 12, 2020 at 9:06 AM
      
      Lauren,
      Good point about Geillis. Not sure about Frank and affairs during the war, but he assumed Claire did. He thought that the Highlander outside her window might have been a former patient or coworker. He did have plenty of them in Boston.
  - Ashley Crawley
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    Author
    
    May 12, 2020 at 12:37 PM
    
    I just gave the rambling list running through my end, but my main takeaway — I don’t know if any of them anchor the betrayal sentiment alone. It feels like a million little fires of betrayal in different places that add up in a big way and lead her to list it among the many horrible things she’s dealt with.
- Sandi
  · Reply
  
  May 12, 2020 at 8:36 AM
  
  PS.
  Crainsmuire is also big when it comes to betrayal. Jaime mentions broken trust before he sends her back through the stones. Marrying Laoghaire was a big deal, big enough to make her question returning.
- Ashley Crawley
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  May 12, 2020 at 12:33 PM
  
  Thanks for always reading and commenting, Sandi! I appreciate it so much.
  Such a very good point in the relief of seeing Claire lose it in the stairwell. I was thinking about it specifically as it related to her overall ordeal and just not wanting her to have gone through anything that requires that necessary breakdown. But I do celebrate any time someone lets the emotions out and doesn’t bottle them up — that does more harm than good. And I am now thinking about it, thanks to you, more specifically to the tears coming as a result of doing the “right thing” by her doctor’s oath and not killing him. This woman, I swear. She is one to watch and behold.
  - Sandi
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    May 14, 2020 at 12:05 PM
    
    Ashley,
    
    Much discussion on the much used rape in both the series and the books. After much thought I would like to put forth a couple of historical reference points. First much of the incidents happen during times of conflict. Rape is a violent act of power. How many times have we heard Jaime refer to his obligation to protect someone’s
    virtue? Women were regarded as property, something in both our culture and time we struggle to wrap our minds around. Best way to strike at an opponent is to defile their women. English did it readily to the Scots to demean the men.
    
    Fast forward to the colonies…no different here either. Brown can best strike Jaime by attacking the still and by attacking Claire. He sees women as property. Abuses his own wife, and he can easily justify his actions against the Frasers because of their actions against Bonnet. Consent has nothing to do with it.
    
    Now present day. Are things really so different or have we just gotten so much better at covering and washing over this horrific form of power? In many parts of the world this is still common and the blame falls squarely on the woman. Perhaps this is why it makes us so uncomfortable. Kudos to Outlander for making the conversations necessary. Let’s hope people are brave enough to have the conversation and to stand up.
    
    Final thought. Richard Brown will be back, but, in my opinion not to avenge Lionel. Jaime and Richard are not aligned politically and Richard knows it. Look at “The Company We Keep”. He hates the Regulators and all they stand for. This will come to blows, but not because of Claire. Lionel doesn’t think beyond his bed or his cups.
Laurie
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May 12, 2020 at 8:13 AM

Ashley, thank you for your beautifully written recaps of the Outlander episodes. I have enjoyed reading all of them. You bring a witty style of writing that is not only a joy to read, but helps us connect with the characters and the other fans. Glad to be a part of this Clan.
- Ashley Crawley
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  May 12, 2020 at 12:38 PM
  
  Laurie, I love that you’re part of this Clan too! And thank you for always reading and offering your comments, feedback and insights. This blog gives me more joy than I can express.
Kristin Gesner
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May 12, 2020 at 9:59 AM

Ashley…thank you so much for this recap. I look forward to it every week and enjoy it always! This was a very different episode and one that should be viewed many times. Every time I rewatched it I found more. Excellent! Cait’s acting was stellar as well as Sam’s. Hers for her in your face dealing with the trauma and Sam for his subtle acting with his face and eyes instead of words. Very powerful! A great ending for us so we can deal with the long Droughtlander we will have to endure. Did you catch the lasting seen was like John and Yoko? So many gifts given by the incredible family of Outlander. I will look forward to your recaps when we meet again. Thank you!
- Ashley Crawley
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  May 12, 2020 at 12:39 PM
  
  Kristin, thank YOU! Appreciate your reading these recaps and taking the time to comment. Since production hasn’t started and it might be fall before it does, I am bracing for the possibility (albeit speculation) of not having Outlander on again until early 2022. I hope that’s wrong. Maybe late 2021. But until then, will keep myself company with the books and rewatching favorite episodes.
Dawn
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May 12, 2020 at 1:40 PM

Hi Ashely!

Thanks so much for your recap. I just love hearing your thoughts and observations!

I know I’m a little late here, but this was an episode I definitely wanted to watched more than once.
It was so chocked full of great (and I mean gut-wrenching stuff), I wouldn’t have done it justice if I saw it only one time.

The best by far was Catorina Bale’s performance as Claire! Rape is definitely Diana’s go to in the Outlander universe, but Claire’s rape was so heart wrenching and nauseating, you could feel all of Claire’s heartbreak.

Of course she would be disassocating, and the 60’s flashes were the ideal thing, as the 60’s was the last time period that Claire remembers. Loved the song and the brightly gaudy modern splashes of color (okay, I’m more of a traditionalist when it comes to furniture and decor)

Loving the extended family all around the table for Thanksgiving (including Martaugh!)

If I had to endure the ignorant, entitled Deliverance-like Brown clan raping me, I would have thrown up all over them!

I think the significance of the orange in Claire’s 60’s vision circled back to Paris in Season 2. Remember when she picked up her orange that King Louis gave her. It was after she slept with Louis to gain Jamie’s release from the Bastile. She picked up her orange and walked out with such dignity, it was so totally Claire!

So many call backs to other seasons. Jamie wrapping her in his tartan “You’re shaking so hard it’s making my teeth rattle” was right out of Sasanach. So sweet and caring of Mr. Frasier, then and now.

Jamie (and her family) is Claire’s lean-to when she was hiding under a blade of grass.

I think when Claire mentioned being betrayed it was because of that HORRIBLE Donner person.
Jesus, what a selfish SOB not to have helped Claire out, especially being a time traveler himself.

For every one of Gallis’s faults, she had an affinity with Claire and saved her from the witch trials.

Donner could have at least TRIED to do something to help (getting the Deliverance rednecks drunk so they passed out wouldn’t have been hard)

Loved the way Furgus, Roger, Ian, and Jamie thought nothing of killing the Brown’s when they realized all that Claire had suffered.

For all of Roger’s second-guessing of what he would or wouldn’t do, it turned out that Claire was the one that could get him to kill–after all, Claire knew him as a little boy, and they even shared a history. More than Roger and Bree, even.

Major kudos to Marsali!!!! Turns out there is more Leghaire in her than one would think–“You hurt me, you hurt my family, you hurt my Ma. You’re going to hell!”

Yeah Girl! Woo-hoot!!! It’s about time somebody killed him. I can only hope that it was painful and that he suffered while the poison was killing him.

Don’t worry that Brown is going to haunt you, you didn’t kill a man, you killed a THING, a roach of a man who is no better than the muck on the bottom of your shoes.

At least with Black Jack and Bonnet, both characters had that little nugget of humanity in their characterizations that made the audience invested in their characters, the Brown’s, however had none of that.

Hopefully, all of the women in Brownsville will cast off their Stepford shackles and celebrate.

I wouldn’t have left Baby Bonnie with them for a million dollars.

I can’t believe that we have to wait again for a new season.
- Moe C.
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  May 12, 2020 at 4:53 PM
  
  Hi Dawn…thank you once again for your so well thought out and crafted reply…I have appreciated reading them all this season and in seasons past. Often, so much of what you are so able to articulate in such a concise organized fashion is what I am thinking but can’t put it into words…so I will admit I will wait to see your post and murmur to myself “yes! What she said!!”. ? Moe
  - Moe C
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    May 12, 2020 at 4:55 PM
    
    Sorry…that’s a thumbs up emoji at the end of my post.
Dawn
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May 13, 2020 at 4:56 PM

Hi Moe1

I swear I say the same things about your posts whenever I read them!

I think that Cat definitely deserves an award for this episode. I usually hate the way that Diana often throws rape as “Woman in Peril” in the Outlander universe when something else would often do just as well.

But I forgot to say that without saying too much, Claire went from the woman we all knew as Claire with all the answers to the woman who just wanted to help, to LeDame Blanche, and then when none of those strategies helped her to escape, when she was in real pain, she dissociated, went from the depths of despair, and found her comfort and strength in Jamie.

He had told her the same thing she had told him in “To Ransom a Man’s Soul.” You are alive, you are whole. ” It totally broke my heart when she admitted that she didn’t know how many of the men raped her, and I literally cheered when she was in Jamie’s bed and arms at the end.

Just amazing work all around!
- Moe C
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  May 13, 2020 at 10:04 PM
  
  Dawn…thank you so much for replying – greatly appreciated! Your third paragraph is SPOT ON!! You nailed it!
  If you have access to Patreon, I left a “minor treatise” on water hemlock, if you are interested. We chatted about medical things earlier in the season, so thought I would mention it. Hope you will be around during Droughtlander!
Cindy Moffitt
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May 13, 2020 at 7:44 PM

Just an observation…all the posts I’ve read have been so scathing of Bree,roger,and Jenny returning. My take is the that the stones send you where you are “supposed to be” . This is where they were meant to be ..at this time. Didn’t hate it
Cathy Akers
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May 14, 2020 at 2:56 PM

So much symbolism to sort through. No way to catch them all one time through.
Something I haven’t seen discussed anywhere, is that I interpreted Claire looking back over her shoulder at Jamie, which they showed at least a couple of times, as Claire knowing that Jamie was coming for her and was looking for him.
Another betrayal I haven’t seen mentioned yet is when Colum allowed her to be tried as a witch. She mentioned the betrayal in the same sentence as imprisonment, and while she was detained a couple of times by BJR, the only time she was truly imprisoned was during the witch trial.

Because of all the symbolism and emotion, this episode has become one that I can re-watch over and over. Its now up there on a par with S1E7, The Wedding as my favorite episode.
Anna
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May 18, 2020 at 4:28 PM

hey…anyone hear about this choir thing with the theme song they were talking about doing ? Hasn’t been done yet has it? Haven’t heard anything since last week when mentioned on the podcast…
Cyndie Gord
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May 22, 2020 at 7:54 PM

Huge fan. I have read the books several times. Watched the seasons more than once. Love the characters. As a rape survivor, I was determined to write about the final episode where Claire is brutally raped multiple times and not one embrace by anyone who came to fight for her. Not one embrace by Jamie. Yes, he carries her off, but then not one ounce of comfort. Brianna was an embarrassment to close the door and leave her mother without comfort. SHAME ON OUTLANDER! Instead you allow Claire to weep in silence on the floor and then end this significant season with her naked on her bed!! This should never have ended that way! Disgusting. You only revictimized rape victims. My heart is broken.