Want a minute-by-minute recap of Outlander Season 3 episode 11, “Uncharted?” We give all the details…
Do you find yourself gabbing obsessively about Outlander to your friends and family? Wishing your Sunday nights included a living room full of people with whom to watch, discuss, comment, cheers, jeers and well, experience alllllll the feels? Dinna fash, Obsessenach—you are not alone.
Good news—we can
get new family and friends pour ourselves a dram and, through the magic of technology, enjoy it together! As we brought to you during Season 2, we’ll be LIVE blogging all the episodes in Season 3. Like the Outlander Cast podcast, it will be SPOILER FREE for non-book readers.
Not into distractions during your visit to the World of Outlander? That’s okay! Our LIVE blogs double as episodic recaps to serve as a trusty viewing companion on your second, third and umpteenth re-watches (hey, we get it).
So get all your post-18th Century gadgets ready and settle in, because the best things in life should be shared with a buddy. Hi, buddy.
Now let the show begin…[8:03 p.m.] Strong sexual content, nudity and the spa-like sounds and images of a sea turtle paddling by… mmm, forget the turkey leftovers—I suddenly have a hankering for turtle soup. [8:04 p.m.] Poor Claire, she’s lost Jamie AND Wilson. Willlllllson! Also, nice barrel roll form, Sassenach. See what I did there? [8:05 p.m.] I’m fully expecting Jack Shephard from Lost to appear on that beach. Also, that she’s not taking a page from the Jamie Fraser playbook and puking her waterlogged brains out right now is beyond me. [8:06 p.m.] Ugh, sand in the corset is the WORST. No one needs an exfoliating scrub on their bubbies. I mean, I can’t even handle sand in my bathing suit after a day at the beach and I have the benefit of a 21st century washer sooo…. [8:07 p.m.] But you know, having to keep on trudging in wet shoes takes a close second. Then again, lass has spent some time in Scotland, sooo… [8:08 p.m.] You’ve got your rule of threes, Claire, and I’ve got mine. As in, I’m only going to be able to survive three episodes without these two engaging in another boink fest (as my mom keeps calling it). Tick tock, Frasers, tick tock. [8:09 p.m.] I can only imagine what’s going through Claire’s mind at a rapid clip right now. Meanwhile my brain is fighting back the cruel irony of Claire’s current situation after declaring to Jamie at Lallybroch that “I wasn’t on an island, but I was out there wishing for you to come and find me.” [8:10 p.m.] Yesssss girl, get on wit yo bad Bear Grylls self! [8:11 p.m.] IT’S ABOUT DAMN TIME WE DECLARED DEATH TO THE BUM ROLL. This is a much better use for that stupid thing. Having full skirts is the least of her concern at present. [8:12 p.m.] I go for bi-weekly shots thanks to a severe fire ant allergy, so I’m going to let you imagine what that scene just did to me mentally. [8:13 p.m.] If episode 1 was Sam Heughan’s moment to shine with little-to-no dialogue, this is definitely Caitriona Balfe’s. I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling her struggle to the parched core. And also feeling a bit guilty for clanking my fork along my dinner bowl and drinking wine while I do so. Though it’s what she’d want, I’m certain. [8:14 p.m.] The sunset’s lovely but as night falls, Claire’s all, “F this noise. I only signed up for a three-hour tour. A threeeeeee-hourrrrr tourrrrr.” [8:15 p.m.] My sincere apologies for that premature assumption that fire ants were going to be Claire’s biggest Fear Factor moment on this island… [8:16 p.m.] It’s not lost on us that skeletal bones seem to follow Claire everywhere she goes… [8:17 p.m.] He’s no Bouton, but he’ll do. Good boy. Now run go find help… And Jamie. [8:18 p.m.] Here’s a thought—let’s stop trying to drink water while lying down. It’s about as effective for thirst relief as filing with a fan on. [8:19 p.m.] Zippers = witch? Hmm. [8:20 p.m.] Pardon me, Father Fogden, but is it me, or does Claire’s post-Survivor, sick-bed hair still look incredible? If Connie Britton’s hair gets its own Twitter handle, so should Caitriona’s. It has definitely outwitted, outplayed and outlasted the hair of mere mortals. [8:22 p.m.] Just lean into the crazy, Claire. Trust me on this one. A little chit-chat with an imaginary coconut friend (can we rename him Wilson?) is worth the trade-off for shelter, food, water, rest and some clean garments. [8:23 p.m.] Settle this—is our new fruity bestie spelled Coco (like Chanel or Ice-T’s wife) or Cocoa (like the yummy drink that I’d like to have right now with a smidge of Bailey’s thrown in)? [8:24 p.m.] Add a scoop of aromatic salts, a couple drops of essential oil, some citrus-infused water and boom—Claire’s just scored herself a $250 Northern California spa treatment. Now someone get that girl a trashy romance novel and a glass of wine to read in that tub ASAP. [8:25 p.m.] You guys, those goats need grass. STAT. [8:26 p.m.] Claire’s channeling her inner Papist—Jamie would be so proud! I’m also tallying up in my head all the tension-ridden meals she’s persevered through in mixed company—Castle Leoch, Paris, Boston (depends on who you ask, I suppose), the Artemis, here… [8:27 p.m.] Mamacita does resting bitch face like no other. If and when she does speak, please god let it be to tell Claire “I hear Richmond’s nice this time of year.” [8:28 p.m.] You’ve chosen poorly, Claire. Take the yupa. I imagine it’ll cure a number of ails befalling you. [8:29 p.m.] As it turns out, zippers = whooore. That face—and mouth—shall rest no more. Hell hath no fury like a riled-up Mamacita. [8:30 p.m.] “The agony of losing a daughter haunts her still.” If only he knew how close to home that hit. [8:32 p.m.] “I will consult with Coco” just became my new automatic reply for all work requests or forced social invitations. [8:33 p.m.] Wow, I’m going to start taking all my dry cleaning to Mamacita. That’s quite the speedy turn-around. [8:34 p.m.] Hold up, Mamacita just blamed a Chinese sailor for Arabella the goat’s new fate as a shelf mate for Coco. Could it be our Chinese sailor? *crosses fingers* Clearly, Claire’s feeling it too… and Bear McCreary, based on this music. [8:35 p.m.] Annnnd, we’re back to Fear Factor. The veracious little critters and the foreshadowing of that fateful Jamaican cave… [8:37 p.m.] Fergus, I am also having unholy and impure thoughts. Only they’re about your papa and my inability to remove my gaze from his bronzed clavicles. But my heart is pure, so according to Papa Fraser, all is well. [8:38 p.m.] “I’m eager to get to Kingston myself, and reunited with my wife.” If Jamie and Claire ever make it to Kingston and are reunited, let’s all chip in to get them an all-inclusive three-nighter in a suite at one of those Sandals resorts. They’ve more than earned it. [8:39 p.m.] I wonder if Credence Clearwater Revival’s “Better Run Through the Jungle” is rolling through her head, or if it’s just me. I always like a good adrenaline song when I run, and CCR’s not a bad choice here, Claire. [8:40 p.m.] Please remember to breathe, please remember to breathe, please remember to breathe…that’s for me, by the way…please remember to breathe, please remember to breathe, please remember to breathe… [8:41 p.m.] Just a lass with spirit is all… and a hell of a lot of resourceful know-how! [8:42 p.m.] Thank Christ indeed! Forget From Here to Eternity, is there no end to the emotion these two stir up in us? [8:43 p.m.] After seeing Jamie’s handiwork as the Dunbonnet with a cleaver and carcass, Mr. Willoughy’s suggested alternate plan for that dead body holds some real merit. Jamie seems to think so too. [8:44 p.m.] I’m having a crown put on my tooth Tuesday. When I issue an Obsessenach-wide SOS mid-drilling, someone remind me how Claire handled getting stitched up without a numbing agent like the wonder woman she is. I also love seeing this turnabout of Jamie tending to Claire’s wounds for a change. Being the patient is always tough for those used to doling out care, so Claire’s warm validation of Mr. Willoughy’s treatment was especially meaningful. [8:45 p.m.] I’d say we could all use a wee bit of joy, Frasers. And a moment to breathe in between danger. [8:46 p.m.] And again, may I recommend that EVERYONE take a quick hit off the yupa peace pipe? Now that we’ve been intermittently waterlogged and dehydrated, imprisoned, blitzed by typhoid, shipwrecked, wounded and everything else I’ve lost count to recall, recreational drug use should be the least of our collective concerns. [8:47 p.m.] It’s bittersweet to watch Claire prep a “daughter” that isn’t Bree for her wedding and first time. Also, Marsali is confirming that any time spent at Lallybroch amidst the 87 bairns is the best form of birth control. I’m tossing up a virtual fist bump to her for wanting to wait to have a baby so she can just enjoy the new intimacy with her husband. That’s so forward for what’s expected of a woman at this time to be able to separate sex from procreation. [8:48 p.m.] I love this vulnerably sweet exchange between Marsali and Claire, so much so that I’ll take a pass on commenting on how creepy weird it is when a young girl basically says, “I want to be as good in the sack as my daddy is.” Oh wait, I just did. [8:49 p.m.] First Jamie and his man shawl, now Fergus and his infinity scarf! These Fraser men bring a strong accessory game. [8:50 p.m.] And it’s official, I adore Lauren Lyle. I mean, I already did but her facial expressions and ornery portrayal of Marsali and her snippy one-liners have left me with a perma-smile. And I am lapping up the edible anticipation between her and Fergus. [8:51 p.m.] And the perma-smile just squirted ugly girl tears. For anyone questioning Jamie’s standing as a father, I’d kindly ask you to
I. Loved. This. Episode. Maybe it was Caitriona Balfe’s believable performance as a woman teetering on the physical edge. Maybe it was actor Nick Fletcher’s quirky but emotional turn as Father Fogden. Maybe it was Lauren Lyle and Cesar Domboy’s adorable chemistry. Maybe it was that sprint-down-the-beach reunion and a moment to exhale from the trials of the past two episodes. Maybe it was Bear’s music, yet again. Maybe it was the sexual healing that came from turtle soup, a high fever, antibiotics and a door with a bolt and seeing that whole iconic scene play out onscreen. The truth is, it was all of it—and more.
After the thrill of the high seas—and putting that whole struggle for survival aside—it was refreshing to be back on dry land. Much like the characters and their story, this episode felt like Outlander letting go of the dizzying effects of being at sea for too long and proving that, indeed, it can stand firmly on its own two feet.
To be clear, though, the anxiety of their separation and physical state pales in comparison to my panic at being one episode closer to the close of this season. Gulp. Much like my dietary habits around the holidays, less is not more. I’m a bit like Oliver Twist* when it comes to Outlander, begging Ron D. Moore and the powers that be, “please sir, can we have some more?” And yet, I’m still thankful for a show that makes me feel this strongly, and this episode proved no different.
Thank you, friends, as always for joining us. If you’ve missed any of our episode recaps, you can catch up with them here:
Episode 3.01: “The Battle Joined”
Episode 3.02: “Surrender”
Episode 3.03: “All Debts Paid”
Episode 3.04: “Of Lost Things”
Episode 3.05: “Freedom & Whisky”
Episode 3.06: “A. Malcolm”
Episode 3.07: “Crème De Menthe”
Episode 3.08: “First Wife”
Episode 3.09: “The Doldrums”
Episode 3.10: “Heaven and Earth”
*A big Outlander thank you to Clan Heughan members Laure Olson and Kathie Manes for straightening out my confusion over iconic Charles Dickens characters! My Tiny Tim reference has been updated to reflect their wisdom.